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I would faithfully put them in the file for future use – but of course it never plays out the same way twice and I never could think quickly enough on the spur of the moment.) But I do think that this whole situation is probably what made Dad say to himself, “Self: give this a think.” And he did.
He studied it, we talked about it, and I was totally on board with him being an active participant once I was old enough for marriage to be on the horizon.
” I would suggest that perhaps they’re being too easily fooled by people using specific “approved” courtship words or methods to mask what’s actually going on.
I would offer a counterpart to his advice to guys: “Girls! He’s asking for the bar to be lowered until it’s on the floor before he’s willing to step over it. And I’ll be real – there were some serious courtship nerds floating around back then as I assume there still are today. He even went so far as to spell out his future career plans and lay out his financial situation to show me that he could support a wife.
If a guy is too much of a pansy to talk to your dad, say good riddance and be grateful you aren’t being troubled by the attentions of a eunuch.” He also wants girls to always answer yes when asked out. Not an overly impressive attitude, and not a trait that would be in any way fun to have in a husband. Dad has always been big on the concept that you need to distinguish between principles and methods – and there were people even way back then who were getting all caught up on the method . The whole thing was just ridiculous – he and I both knew that what he wanted was a girlfriend for the weekend, but at this particular conference you had to wrap that up in proper “courtship” language.
My response was generally something like, “AAAAGGGHHH!!!!
” although if I had been asked directly by the guy it would have taken me 20 painful minutes to make him understand that I probably wouldn’t go out with him no matter what night of the week he suggested.
I’m only speaking for myself here because I’ve never even met Josh Harris, but I would assume that something similar was going on with them in the homeschooling camp.