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Dealing with the parents on your own, is the absolute hardest part.” And that last part was a sentiment expressed repeatedly by the nannies I spoke to; they love their jobs, but there is just way too much expected of them. Some parents literally never see their kids.” Another nanny was quick to add: “You always hear on TV about nannies butting heads with their mom boss, and I don’t know if that’s true, but I do know that a lot of moms get jealous that we get to spend so much time with their children, and know the ins-and-outs of their lives better than they do.
I worked for one mom who didn’t even know where her kid’s toys and daily essentials were, and she would get upset and say things like ‘I don’t even know where the stuff is in my own house.’ I knew that she wasn’t actually upset with me, and it was easy to see her feeling the working mom guilt, but it was stressful.” In retrospect, I think that’s a pretty fair assessment.
And a lot of it has to do with the parents wanting to get “their money’s worth.” “We are expected to spend every single second working, because those are seconds that families feel like they’re paying for,” relents one anonymous and exhausted nanny. What mom cooks, cleans, and cares for children in creative and entertaining ways, all day long, five to six days a week, without getting a break?
What mom has a gourmet dinner on the table every single night, and always keeps a spotless house?
“Even though the feelings were not mutual, I was given the nickname ‘Nannygate,’ by [the girlfriend] he was dating at the time.
Not long after, convinced that I had feelings for my dad boss, the girlfriend waited until I took my vacation week, and then replaced me while I was gone.” Although I had quickly found myself in the middle of the very drama I’d been hoping to find, I soon learned that the most common blurring of professional boundaries came not with scandal, but with something else entirely.
I think the craziest thing for me is the expectation that I will do anything, regardless of the request or time it would take to do it in addition to keeping the children alive.” “I’m expected to do so many things other than care for the children, such as the time I was asked to spend my morning searching seven grocery stores for some kind of Chinese lettuce my boss wanted,” she continues.
“I ended up finding it in an obscure international market 30 minutes away from their house.
If you are truly dedicated to your job, caring for these kids takes a special place in your heart and it becomes so much more than just business.” But at the end of the day, it a business, and when I polled the group as to what employment benefits many of them received along with their salary, the list varied from extensive vacation and sick days to multiple club memberships, the use of a vehicle, and getting to vacation with the family.
And there was nothing that I wanted more than to dip my toes into the drama of their lives.
According to International Nanny Association, there are between 800,000 and 1.2 million professional nannies living and working in the United States.
At first, the tales were just as juicy as I’d hoped. M., a 28-year-old nanny from Virginia Beach, Virginia.
“I have a friend who is now married to her dad boss, and is the step mother to her nanny kids. “And I just heard the other day about another nanny that is pregnant by her dad boss! ) and even earned the prestigious “Nanny of the Year” award in 2017 from the International Nanny Association.
With far less grace than I would have liked, I boldly asked them to spill all their secrets to me, and was shocked and delighted when they did.